8.24.2009

wonderful weakness

But I will sing of Your power;
Yes, I will sing aloud of Your mercy in the morning; 
For You have been my defense 
And refuge in the day of my trouble.
To You, O my Strength, I will sing praises;
For God is my defense, 
My God of mercy.
[Psalm 59:16-17]

I am so weak right now: physically weak because of the blood loss that I experienced and everything associated with that and emotionally weak from a heart that is still broken and trying to process and understand what has happened in the wake of the miscarriage. It has been a wonder to me that my friends have mentioned my strength this week. I need to tell you, friends, that my strength does not come from a strong heart, a strong body, or even a strong faith; my strength comes from God alone.

If I was strong enough to carry myself in any capacity through this trial, why then would I need to cry out to God at all? There is none stronger than God; and for all of the Mr. Universes and Mrs. Strongwoman competitions, there is none who even comes remotely close to Him in strength and power. The Bible makes it clear that He spoke everything you see and feel (and everything you don't see and feel!) into existence. Spoke. As in, He said, "Let there be light!" and light just appeared. "Let there be trees! Mountains! The Marianas Trench! All of dry land! Fish! Duck-billed platypusses! Bacteria! Diplodocuses!" ...and they existed. He has more strength in His voice than you or I could ever hope to have in our bodies. He fashioned man out of some dust and woman out of one of the man's ribs. He is the same God who was strong enough to bear the weight of all of the sin ever on His shoulders and carried it to Calvary and He is the same God who was strong enough to overcome Death. And He is the same God who will rend the clouds and return to destroy Satan.

Why would I want my strength to come from myself, when I could find my strength in Him??? I am not strong in any means of the word. Any faith I have, He has given to me, so it's not my strong faith to begin with. It's His. 

I thank you all for the encouragement. Please, please don't mistake me; I have appreciated and been encouraged in my faith by your comments and I am so blessed to know that you realize that my God is all that I have and everything that I have. But I don't want to take the credit for being strong, when truly my strength comes from God Almighty! And I am so grateful for that. I don't have to be strong; I just need to be willing to rely fully on the strength of the God with whom all things are possible!!



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